One of you calls for me, the other one calls more.
You're both trying to impress me, I've seen this stuff before.
Sometimes attention's rather fun, if I desire it from you,
But when it's doubled up, then my heart is ripped in two.
Oh why oh why must you BOTH torture me so?
I really should speak up, but how? I don't know.
You two have got me in a mess, and I'm totally confused.
Sooner or later I've gotta pick just one of you.
I must've been bowled over when I saw you the first time,
I knew I had to have you, but I couldn't make up my mind.
Anyway, I courted you, I sent my appeals in your direction.
Leaving my uncertain fate up to your discretion.
How'd I know that you would return my ardor?
How'd I know that there'd be two of you?
One is north of me, one is south of me,
And I don't know what I'm going to do!
The fate of my life next year is totally on the line.
I'm usually so clear and calm, but I can't make up my mind.
I love competition, but this is all too much for me so,
Can somebody please help me pick where I'm supposed to go?
Hey hey readers! Well, this ain't no "Shall I compare thee" like earlier in the year, but what's a girl to do when she can't make up her mind? Some say the more the merrier, but I am not sure how merry I am when I can't pick between TWO options. Out of my six offers for grad school, I am really stuck between two of them. And although the application process is over and done, the selection is majorly kicking my butt! I am SO not looking forward to the deadline. This is probably going to turn out like a rehash of my senior year of high school; making that decision with less than a week before the deadline. I'm going to go sign off now and try not to pull out too much of my hair in the process...
Showing posts with label competition. Show all posts
Showing posts with label competition. Show all posts
Monday, March 30, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Be yourself!
The Big Fat GWS Conference is done. It's been over since December. It was a good event, though.
I was really glad that I had presented it. I talked to my advisor, Jacque at GWS, and she said that the senior capstone conference is always an event she looks forward to because of the variety of topics and expertise of the students.
I was talking to her about some of the decisions I had made throughout my college career, and as I spoke about them, I realized one of the biggest impetuses for anything I've done was to prove something. Not to any of my professors or classmates or friends...but to myself.
College has been such a time of re-defining, of remaking and reinventing myself. I was no longer the shy little geeky girl, and I had really come into my own. I've been the type to constantly push myself until I get exactly what I want. The conference, I figured, not only proved to the faculty and students that I could write about social services and field questions about them but also to myself, that I had the confidence and the drive to do so. I've acted in one of my favorite plays, "The Vagina Monologues," and it's been a totally rewarding experience. The actresses are lovely to meet and get to know, and the money goes to a good cause. But, again, part of the reason I've been in such an outrageous play is to prove that I can do it. The highschool/gradeschool version of me would never have had the nerve to talk about vaginas onstage, let alone ask the audience what theirs smelled like! And I certainly wouldn't have been able to speak for twenty minutes about my paper at the conference had I kept my shyness.
The same goes for this year's decisions. I made this past semester one of the most productive for Fem Maj, with three co-sponsorships and an even more popular panel. When I organized Sex Out Loud, I went over and into Illini Arcade and sat down with the manager to tell her exactly what we wanted her to do. She told me that the previous presidents didn't have the nerve to go into the store. Although some might raise their eyebrows at the thought of me in the sex shop, I needed to talk to the people I'd be including in the event. I wanted to show all the participants that I valued their presence, so I met with each of them personally before the event (with the exception of NARAL, but I talked on the phone with them). But I wanted to prove--to myself--that I could do better than just following in the footsteps of the previous presidents and forge a new era for Fem Maj.
They say to be yourself. But sometimes that "yourself" needs a little tweaking to make it the "yourself" you most want to identify as.
I was really glad that I had presented it. I talked to my advisor, Jacque at GWS, and she said that the senior capstone conference is always an event she looks forward to because of the variety of topics and expertise of the students.
I was talking to her about some of the decisions I had made throughout my college career, and as I spoke about them, I realized one of the biggest impetuses for anything I've done was to prove something. Not to any of my professors or classmates or friends...but to myself.
College has been such a time of re-defining, of remaking and reinventing myself. I was no longer the shy little geeky girl, and I had really come into my own. I've been the type to constantly push myself until I get exactly what I want. The conference, I figured, not only proved to the faculty and students that I could write about social services and field questions about them but also to myself, that I had the confidence and the drive to do so. I've acted in one of my favorite plays, "The Vagina Monologues," and it's been a totally rewarding experience. The actresses are lovely to meet and get to know, and the money goes to a good cause. But, again, part of the reason I've been in such an outrageous play is to prove that I can do it. The highschool/gradeschool version of me would never have had the nerve to talk about vaginas onstage, let alone ask the audience what theirs smelled like! And I certainly wouldn't have been able to speak for twenty minutes about my paper at the conference had I kept my shyness.
The same goes for this year's decisions. I made this past semester one of the most productive for Fem Maj, with three co-sponsorships and an even more popular panel. When I organized Sex Out Loud, I went over and into Illini Arcade and sat down with the manager to tell her exactly what we wanted her to do. She told me that the previous presidents didn't have the nerve to go into the store. Although some might raise their eyebrows at the thought of me in the sex shop, I needed to talk to the people I'd be including in the event. I wanted to show all the participants that I valued their presence, so I met with each of them personally before the event (with the exception of NARAL, but I talked on the phone with them). But I wanted to prove--to myself--that I could do better than just following in the footsteps of the previous presidents and forge a new era for Fem Maj.
They say to be yourself. But sometimes that "yourself" needs a little tweaking to make it the "yourself" you most want to identify as.
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