Okay, KoRn and Evanescence and the other nice people on that summer tour will have to forgive me for the title. I always find it funny that some of the darkest, creepiest, most morose and gloomy bands on earth always can be found on a tour named "Family Values," because they're the last thing anyone would think of when you think of family values.
But that got me thinking, what does family values mean, anyway? I recently had a conversation with a relative, and she was saying that this nation would not be in the state it was in if people "had more family values." I was pretty sure that my definition of it and hers were not the same thing, and her statement "Well, people need to be more God-fearing" only drove that difference home. Then I realized (as she elaborated onward) that that wish for "family values" meant the same thing a lot of the conservative right supports--"traditional" family (where the wife stays home and takes care of the kids and the husband is the breadwinner), an end to accessible abortion, prayer taught in schools, and absolutely no civil marriages/adoptions for the gay community.
I know she has a right to think what she wants to think, but I had to let her know that some of her reasons were wrong and that she left many more effective things out.
You want to talk family values?
I'd start by doing just that--valuing families. Raise the minimum wage. A family living on minimum wage cannot easily support itself, as they would be well below the poverty line. Maybe create accessible childcare at work. That way, not only would new jobs be created (by increasing the need for people to staff and maintain that childcare), but the parents wouldn't have to worry about their children when they're at work.
Another thing would be to improve the public school system. No, I don't mean call for prayer in public schools, but instead of give everyone a safe and clean and accessible environment. If kids are the future, then you need to treat them like a good future. It's disgusting to see how some public schools are clean and bright and have everything the students need and how others are dank and gross and generally unsavory places.
You want to talk about God-fearing?
Then start by living out your words. Why not start with getting rid of some of the evil you've helped create? Allowing millions of people to live on the streets without a home is evil. Not allowing a woman to have an abortion (a relatively safe procedure) when her life is in danger is evil (funny how that crowd never mentions protecting the life of the mother. Is her life less precious than the life of something that's still part of her?). Letting millions of people go hungry is evil. Fostering prejudice against any particular group (and then saying "that's the way things are" or "they're disrupting our way of life") is really evil. All of those are things that threaten the dignity of some families (and of life too).
So why doesn't the family values crowd talk about that or take steps or change all of that? The first place they can start is right here.
Saturday, September 8, 2007
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Sisterhood and Brotherhood are Powerful...Global...Forever
You can never truly know another person's sufferings.
But you can learn and support that person.
It totally boggles my mind to hear the number of people who think that feminism is no longer relevant. It boggles my mind even further to hear them say that males can't be feminists. At Quad Day, when I staffed the feminist booth, I heard several guys say that they couldn't join/sign up because they weren't women.
Apparantly, those guys don't know their history. The fact is, unless you identify as a separatist, the women's movement has always had its male supporters. Any kind of civil rights movement has had (and probably would not have gone as far without) its allies in different groups. From the beginnings of the first wave of feminism, with men attending the Seneca Falls convention, to the present day, there have always been men to support women's advancement. When I staffed my crisis center's fundraiser, a good third of the people in the marquee tent were men. And this fundraiser was enormously huge--the guests numbered in the thousands! My dad was the one who introduced me to women's liberation--way back in first grade. It is in no way "natural" or "intrinsic" for men to be sexist or put women down. Last time I checked, men are people and people do come with reasoning and ethics. And they are more than capable of noticing and pointing out when something isn't fair.
And that goes for just about any other kind of civil rights. The nation saw people of all races come out and show their support during the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s--it wasn't just limited to the black community. I've participated in the Day of Silence and other events that support LGBT rights because that's what I believe in. I'm heterosexual, but I've got the Day of Silence shirt and the rainbow ribbons. I have supported diversity initiatives and have never been fooled by people who use "tokenism" as a replacement for real and actual diversity.
As I am not part of many of the groups I support, I suppose I can never know exactly what they feel or have to go through. I realize that, and I'm not going to pretend to know everything.
But I can learn.
And with learning comes tolerance and support--exactly what the world needs to fight injustice. Sisterhood is certainly powerful, but having allies of all kinds is even more so.
But you can learn and support that person.
It totally boggles my mind to hear the number of people who think that feminism is no longer relevant. It boggles my mind even further to hear them say that males can't be feminists. At Quad Day, when I staffed the feminist booth, I heard several guys say that they couldn't join/sign up because they weren't women.
Apparantly, those guys don't know their history. The fact is, unless you identify as a separatist, the women's movement has always had its male supporters. Any kind of civil rights movement has had (and probably would not have gone as far without) its allies in different groups. From the beginnings of the first wave of feminism, with men attending the Seneca Falls convention, to the present day, there have always been men to support women's advancement. When I staffed my crisis center's fundraiser, a good third of the people in the marquee tent were men. And this fundraiser was enormously huge--the guests numbered in the thousands! My dad was the one who introduced me to women's liberation--way back in first grade. It is in no way "natural" or "intrinsic" for men to be sexist or put women down. Last time I checked, men are people and people do come with reasoning and ethics. And they are more than capable of noticing and pointing out when something isn't fair.
And that goes for just about any other kind of civil rights. The nation saw people of all races come out and show their support during the Civil Rights movement of the 1960s--it wasn't just limited to the black community. I've participated in the Day of Silence and other events that support LGBT rights because that's what I believe in. I'm heterosexual, but I've got the Day of Silence shirt and the rainbow ribbons. I have supported diversity initiatives and have never been fooled by people who use "tokenism" as a replacement for real and actual diversity.
As I am not part of many of the groups I support, I suppose I can never know exactly what they feel or have to go through. I realize that, and I'm not going to pretend to know everything.
But I can learn.
And with learning comes tolerance and support--exactly what the world needs to fight injustice. Sisterhood is certainly powerful, but having allies of all kinds is even more so.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Way to go, Ohio!
Yet another reason for me to love Over the Rhine, besides their excellent music, solid live shows, adorable tour shirts, and very genuinely nice manner when you meet them. (They're really nice and stay around to meet and talk to the fans).
Some musicians start their own clothing line. Some have insane fan clubs. Some star in their own movies.
But can you name another band that has its own line of COFFEE?
I didn't think so either!
(By the way, they really do have their own delectable line of coffees, the Over the Rhine blend, and it's almost as good as their songs. I did say almost.)
Some musicians start their own clothing line. Some have insane fan clubs. Some star in their own movies.
But can you name another band that has its own line of COFFEE?
I didn't think so either!
(By the way, they really do have their own delectable line of coffees, the Over the Rhine blend, and it's almost as good as their songs. I did say almost.)
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Emily Post, eat ya heart out!
Alex's Top Ten Commandments for Summer Concertgoing
10. Thou shalt not mosh. Seriously, whose brilliant idea was moshing? It's basically a mess of drunks trying to pass each other over each other's heads while hooting and hollering to all of their friends. When the sober person trapped in the moshpit decides not to pass the mosher and he falls, he screams and yells at the sober person. And then none of the moshers remember it the next day. The sober person does, and it has severely damaged his/her concertgoing experience.
9. Thou shalt remember thy deoderant. ENOUGH SAID!!!
8. Thou shalt not grab another concertgoer's butt when passing her. I've had that happen to me, and I am seriously thinking of getting a full-length porcupine dress with a train to wear to the next show. Let's see someone grab that! But seriously, I am not for you to grab! That is why my butt and other parts of me are on me! They're not yours.
7. Thou shalt not go all fangrl/fanboy on an artist that thou dost not know all that well. I'm warnething you! You might as well go bury your head in the sand along with the 98 degrees fans and Y2K alarmists because nothing looks sillier.
6. Thou shalt not wear a dress over thine pants. Look, if dresses were meant to be worn with pants they would be called shirts. And I think there is already something called a shirt.
5. Thou shalt not wear girl's clothes if thou canst not fit into said girl's clothes. Muffintops are never attractive on ANYONE.
4. If thou art staffing the merch table, thou shalt not charge in excess of $25 for a tour shirt. (I don't want to name names, but a little snooping around the merch tables and seeing their prices should make your toes curl.)
3. Thou shalt know at least the hits of the artist/band that thou art seeing.
2. Thou shalt use protection and practice safe sound if thou art seeing a really loud band. To minimize any ringing in the ears, I recomment "foamy" disposable earplugs. Better safe than sorry! And cotton balls just won't do the trick. They don't work.
1. Thou shalt not get so smashed or stoned that thou canst not remember the show the next day. Look, if you're making the voyage and paying to get in, you'll want to remember the experience!
That is all. Alex has spoken.
"A grl can do what she wants to do, and that's all I'm gonna do. So I don't give a damn about my bad reputation. Oh no! Not me!"
10. Thou shalt not mosh. Seriously, whose brilliant idea was moshing? It's basically a mess of drunks trying to pass each other over each other's heads while hooting and hollering to all of their friends. When the sober person trapped in the moshpit decides not to pass the mosher and he falls, he screams and yells at the sober person. And then none of the moshers remember it the next day. The sober person does, and it has severely damaged his/her concertgoing experience.
9. Thou shalt remember thy deoderant. ENOUGH SAID!!!
8. Thou shalt not grab another concertgoer's butt when passing her. I've had that happen to me, and I am seriously thinking of getting a full-length porcupine dress with a train to wear to the next show. Let's see someone grab that! But seriously, I am not for you to grab! That is why my butt and other parts of me are on me! They're not yours.
7. Thou shalt not go all fangrl/fanboy on an artist that thou dost not know all that well. I'm warnething you! You might as well go bury your head in the sand along with the 98 degrees fans and Y2K alarmists because nothing looks sillier.
6. Thou shalt not wear a dress over thine pants. Look, if dresses were meant to be worn with pants they would be called shirts. And I think there is already something called a shirt.
5. Thou shalt not wear girl's clothes if thou canst not fit into said girl's clothes. Muffintops are never attractive on ANYONE.
4. If thou art staffing the merch table, thou shalt not charge in excess of $25 for a tour shirt. (I don't want to name names, but a little snooping around the merch tables and seeing their prices should make your toes curl.)
3. Thou shalt know at least the hits of the artist/band that thou art seeing.
2. Thou shalt use protection and practice safe sound if thou art seeing a really loud band. To minimize any ringing in the ears, I recomment "foamy" disposable earplugs. Better safe than sorry! And cotton balls just won't do the trick. They don't work.
1. Thou shalt not get so smashed or stoned that thou canst not remember the show the next day. Look, if you're making the voyage and paying to get in, you'll want to remember the experience!
That is all. Alex has spoken.
"A grl can do what she wants to do, and that's all I'm gonna do. So I don't give a damn about my bad reputation. Oh no! Not me!"
Friday, June 15, 2007
Tales from the Tent
One of the highlights of the summer so far was the summer Women Helping Women social/fundraiser for the local women's shelter. And I, being one of their social committee members, got to help with it! I did everything they needed me for--prepping up the silent auctions, running water to the guest speakers, wrapping up the prizes from the auction (including a fabulous Revel set of jewelry made by my own fair hands) and helping the guests take them to their cars, and disassembling the enormous tent they had rented. It was a good time, and the LaCASA staff really appreciated my efforts. They had gone ALL OUT for the event (trio of musicians including a harp player, fans in the tent, CICADA netting although those bugs haven't come this far north yet, and some uberfancy decorations), and it really paid off. We met capacity for the tent--700 guests and 40-some staffers running in and out to help them. What was especially surprising was the number of men there. I would say that among the 700 guests there were between 200 and 300 men. I was most impressed by the number of men because I feel it's an issue that they should get more involved in. They seemed as though they wanted to be there and help out the cause of aiding domestic violence survivors. The guests were pretty diverse--teens, adults, politicians, a minister, the owners of several local businesses, teachers, and even a local rock band named Avigilante to name a few.
I had arrived when the speakers began. Our speakers were a singer (and incest survivor) and the prosecutor for sex crimes in Queens, NY. The singer was first. She did a terrific acoustic song with an upbeat instrumentation, but some chilling lyrics about her experience. When she began to speak about her father's physical and emotional abuse of her, most of the audience was tearing up. It was heartrending--not just what he did to her but also how few people believed that harrowing story. The prosecutor was intense. She told her stories about the disbelief people have shown towards the survivors, and many people in the audience were crying by this time. It was heartbreaking to say the least, but it was also a good sign that the people cared.
My shift went until the end, so I stayed on to help the guests and dismantle the marquis tent when they had left (yep, I got to dismantle that huge tent in a dress! Yeah!). But seeing the crowds that showed up--all for the same cause--was so inspiring. They were all there because they cared about preventing and helping the survivors of sexual assault. They were there because they wanted to make a difference in their own way (several are now volunteering or working at LaCASA). It was an amazing sight and experience to behold.
I wish I could show this sight to anyone who thinks domestic violence is just the survivor's issue. The throngs of guests from our community and from other towns (not to mention the big staff) show that it is anything but! They really made me aware of the power of everyone's efforts.
I had arrived when the speakers began. Our speakers were a singer (and incest survivor) and the prosecutor for sex crimes in Queens, NY. The singer was first. She did a terrific acoustic song with an upbeat instrumentation, but some chilling lyrics about her experience. When she began to speak about her father's physical and emotional abuse of her, most of the audience was tearing up. It was heartrending--not just what he did to her but also how few people believed that harrowing story. The prosecutor was intense. She told her stories about the disbelief people have shown towards the survivors, and many people in the audience were crying by this time. It was heartbreaking to say the least, but it was also a good sign that the people cared.
My shift went until the end, so I stayed on to help the guests and dismantle the marquis tent when they had left (yep, I got to dismantle that huge tent in a dress! Yeah!). But seeing the crowds that showed up--all for the same cause--was so inspiring. They were all there because they cared about preventing and helping the survivors of sexual assault. They were there because they wanted to make a difference in their own way (several are now volunteering or working at LaCASA). It was an amazing sight and experience to behold.
I wish I could show this sight to anyone who thinks domestic violence is just the survivor's issue. The throngs of guests from our community and from other towns (not to mention the big staff) show that it is anything but! They really made me aware of the power of everyone's efforts.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Pieces of me
All right, I REALLY can't stand the song I used to title this entry, but it was fitting for today. Well, today I've been feeling incredibly good about myself. I just donated a foot of quality Alex-hair to Locks of Love. My stylist just made a footlong ponytail and then practically SAWED it off with a scissors and then styled it to make it presentable. I must say, this is the shortest I've had my hair (aside from when I was a baby) for as long as I can remember. It's actually kind of cute--it's like a shorter page-cut, and it curls up underneath. Didn't know that would happen, but I like the results and think I will get it again this way. Either that or I'll grow it long again to donate another foot of it. It's so much more manageable than the mane was and it doesn't even mess when I headbang! It's kind of funny--I normally don't consider myself to be self-absorbed, but I've been playing with the hair at its new length and flipping it around (and when I got home, I just wanted to show it off!).
I'm not trying to sound self-righteous, but I swear, you've got bits and pieces of Alex going everywhere! I give my blood every three months (although I can't do it until September because of my recent piercing), I've given plasma at the plasma drive, and I've got the organ donor on my drivers license. And now the hair. Guess if I can't be of use to people, then pieces of me should be!
I'm not trying to sound self-righteous, but I swear, you've got bits and pieces of Alex going everywhere! I give my blood every three months (although I can't do it until September because of my recent piercing), I've given plasma at the plasma drive, and I've got the organ donor on my drivers license. And now the hair. Guess if I can't be of use to people, then pieces of me should be!
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Fake your way to the top!
I am viewing my collection of CDs and DVDs and am struck by a revelation.
Why is it that the movies that feature fake bands almost always have better music than most real bands out there? I have the soundtracks and/or the DVDs for these movies:
The Blues Brothers
This is Spinal Tap (don't know how to do the umlaut thingy over the "n")
Josie and the Pussycats
Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
Dreamgirls
Almost Famous
Edgeplay (well, technically, the band was prefabricated but the grls did have talent--OK, I'm stopping there before I launch into the history of the Runaways)
I swear, all of these soundtracks are on my "most played" list on my computer, and I've probably worn out the DVDs for most of them! Most of the stuff on the soundtracks is pretty basic. Everyone knows "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going" from Dreamgirls because it's a standard, and "Cherry Bomb" (from Edgeplay) is a cult classic. And even I (out of practice and all!) could probably best Rachael Leigh Cook in an axe-off, since the riffs are pretty much all three chords. But seriously, it's still some catchy stuff out there and to me, a lot more fun and catchy than most of the stuff on the radio. Now if only some of these bands (with the exception of the Runaways, which came, sang, and conquered the Japanese market before dissolving) were real ones.
A grl can dream, right?
Why is it that the movies that feature fake bands almost always have better music than most real bands out there? I have the soundtracks and/or the DVDs for these movies:
The Blues Brothers
This is Spinal Tap (don't know how to do the umlaut thingy over the "n")
Josie and the Pussycats
Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains
O Brother, Where Art Thou?
Dreamgirls
Almost Famous
Edgeplay (well, technically, the band was prefabricated but the grls did have talent--OK, I'm stopping there before I launch into the history of the Runaways)
I swear, all of these soundtracks are on my "most played" list on my computer, and I've probably worn out the DVDs for most of them! Most of the stuff on the soundtracks is pretty basic. Everyone knows "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going" from Dreamgirls because it's a standard, and "Cherry Bomb" (from Edgeplay) is a cult classic. And even I (out of practice and all!) could probably best Rachael Leigh Cook in an axe-off, since the riffs are pretty much all three chords. But seriously, it's still some catchy stuff out there and to me, a lot more fun and catchy than most of the stuff on the radio. Now if only some of these bands (with the exception of the Runaways, which came, sang, and conquered the Japanese market before dissolving) were real ones.
A grl can dream, right?
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