Have a happy period!

I really wonder who gets hired to work in marketing for certain companies and how they get those jobs. I mean, if I had half a mind, I could do it too. And by half a mind, I mean exactly half a mind.

First there's the Always feminine products. Okay, I will say it. I'm female, I've used Always at some point in my life. Their stuff is inexpensive, and let's face it, using some form of protection is better than the much messier alternative. But what is with their ad campaign? For their advertising message is, "Have a happy period." I mean, what the hell? Most women (myself included) really see nothing "happy" about it. Does anything about cramping, clots, and casting up everything you've eaten sound "happy"? I think not. But on the Always website (you can find it at www.beinggirl.com), you can find that asinine message, as well as some truly patronizing e-cards about menstruating. I'm serious. E-cards! You know, the one thing worse than that combination of nausea, cramps, and clots is having some bright little card telling you to cheer up and be happy.

The second thing just cracks me up in a very twisted sort of way. On the polar opposite end of the Always ads and their bright, happy, in-your-face messages about periods, is the complete silence about them. I mean, for goodness sake, it's just a period. While it's not the most pleasant thing in the world, menstruation is natural. If something exists, it is natural. And for most women ages 9 and up (or earlier, there are some who get it early), it is a fact of life. Or was a fact of life. Or will be a fact of life. That's all. But when I was at Walgreens today to pick up some stuff, I saw some tampon carrying cases and some tiny little tampons in a box saying "No one will know it's that time." So apparantly they think that it's shameful to just go through a natural female occurrence? Let's get this straight. What is so shameful about doing what 51% of the world does at some time or another in their life? It doesn't change anything about the person you are. I've heard some ridiculous sexist drivel, that women are irrational when they menstruate, but surely we all know that this isn't the case. Maybe somewhat emotional, but that's because cramping hurts like hell. If males were going through that every month, I can assure you that we wouldn't be hearing any of that. And you know what, tampons would probably be free.

Well, after I've just dedicated a post to menstruating, I figure the smart thing is to treat the issue like what it is, something normal and natural. If it exists, it is natural. It's no special cause for celebration like the Always campaign says, and it's no cause for shame. It just is there. That's all. Really.

And a message to Always: You want to make this time more tolerable? Lose the damn e-cards and Pad-O-Meter. They won't do anything for us. Make your products free! I can assure you, that will make many women a lot happier than some asinine card.