Saturday, March 17, 2012

No Man's Woman

So, in honor of St. Patrick's Day, this southern-European descended lady with no Irish in her is listening only to performers from The Emerald Isle. So here's what I have on repeat.

No Man's Woman

I don't wanna be no man's woman
It don't make me happy, this mantrolling
Thing that you got for me, so I become
No man's woman

I don't wanna be no man's woman
I've other work I want to get done
I have not traveled this far to become
No man's woman
No man's woman

Cause I'm TIRED of it
And I'm SO sick of it
That I'll never trust again.
Cause a man can take you,
Take your soul and make you
Miserable in so much pain.

My friends think I'm alone, but I've got secrets.
I don't tell everyone 'bout the love I get.
I've got a lovin' man, but He's a spirit...

He never does me harm, never treats me bad.
He never takes away all the love he has
And I'm forgiven, oh a million times

I've never tired of it
And I'm not so sick of it
Cause it doesn't cause me pain
Like a man can fake you,
Take your soul and make you
Never be yourself again.

I NEVER wanna be no man's woman.
I only wanna be MY OWN woman
I haven't traveled this far to become
No man's woman
No man's woman
No man's woman

By Sinead O'Connor. Put aside any preconceptions you might have of her off-stage antics; the woman is super-talented.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

An open letter for Gary Trudeau

Dear Gary,

You. Are. Awesome.

And by that, I mean completely awesome.

I think it's way too bad that people are censoring your Doonesbury series about the new restrictions on reproductive freedom. As a woman living day in and day out in this culture, I find it to be totally ridiculous that I and my sisters are expected to just sit back and put up with all these scary restrictions on our own healthcare that will affect our lives...but a cartoon disagreeing with this (and drawn by a man, no less!) has to be censored so as not to hurt the feelings of the males who came up with these scary restrictions. Where is the logic in this? People like me have to sit back and have a transvaginal sonogram if we are seeking an abortion or be called sluts if we are sexually active, but the men (who will not be pregnant) who created these laws are offended by a comic strip about this? I have had enough of this!

But you know what, Gary? As my way of saying thanks for your art, I'm going to be a friend for you. I'm going to do my little part in making sure more people see what you intended, rather than the censored strips. So Revel readers, make sure you take a look: http://www.rhrealitycheck.org/article/2012/03/13/new-media-rule-107-censorship-has-opposite-desired-effect. Today for me, tomorrow for you, as Angel from Rent would say.

So thanks, Gary. This revel is grateful. And I hope you don't have any more inspiration for similar strips, as all the restrictions on reproductive freedoms are really scaring me.

Your friend,

Revel

Friday, March 2, 2012

Traveling with Revel

Hello readers! I was doing a little bit of thinking today about some of my favorite things to do--doing anti-oppression work and learning all about other cultures. That got me thinking about some of my favorite places to visit, ethnic enclaves in major metropolitan areas. I realized, then, that as a white anti-racist ally, I always try to be respectful and not obnoxious when I visit these places. Don't you hate seeing the person who is gawking at everything and acting like the community is a museum and not a place where real, living people actually live and work? I can't stand it either!

So I figured that I could create a how-to guide for visiting these wonderful places in a respectful and informed manner. Is this guide complete? Absolutely not, as I'm sure that others will have something to offer based on their own living experiences. Besides, at the end of the day, I do not live in such a community and would love to hear about the experiences of those who do. But for now, this is an ally's guide to visiting an ethnic enclave. The examples I'm using are in Chicago, but the guide can be transferred to other areas.

1. Do your homework. This is a big one. It would behoove you to learn about the population of the neighborhood you're visiting, what their history is and how they made their mark on their area. This will inform you as to why it looks the way it does and how its population has changed over time. For example, Pilsen on the west side of Chicago has a huge Latino/a population now. However, it was originally a haven for Eastern Europeans when it was first settled. Take a little time and learn before you go.

2. Don't stare. Or make judgmental comments. Show some respect. You are not visiting a theme park. People live and work in these areas, and they are just trying to live their lives just like you are. They don't need to hear the clueless visitor asking why everything is "so weird" in earshot of them or staring at them in a way that makes them uncomfortable. They are not there to cater to you. How would you feel if someone came into your area and started criticizing everything?

3. Get your learnin' on! Take advantage of the museums or libraries there. You never know what you might learn about the community. Ask the docents questions: that's what they're there for, and they'll probably be happy to talk. (The Chinese-American Museum of Chicago in Armour Square has some super-cool docents, and they're always around.)

4. Think before you speak. Consider how what you're saying might come across. Being along Argyle Street in Chicago and calling it "New Chinatown" is not only offensive, but it's totally incorrect. (Argyle has a large Vietnamese-American population.) And another thing, if the area is not home to a population who spoke English in their home country, do not talk slowly and loudly to those you meet these. I am sure that most of them understand what you are saying and do not need to be talked down to. The folks at the Puerto Rican Day parade understand what you're saying. No need to treat them like they don't.

5. Ask questions. If you don't know what a sign says, just ask. Chances are, someone will tell you and not be snotty about it. I may be 3/8 Greek, but I speak English and Spanish. I do not speak Greek and cannot read the words. So I'm always grateful for the nice folks in Greektown who can tell me what the signs and displays at stores say. Ask nicely and you shall hear. And feel free to ask what's in a dish at a restaurant if you don't know. The servers will be happy to tell you.

6. Watch your language. Make sure your language reflects how that community identifies. Saying the word "Oriental" in a predominantly Asian area is not going to endear you to the locals. I mean it. That term is so outdated. Or if you are in a primarily Latino area, do not start talking about "illegal aliens." You will sound so rude and racist, and no one needs that.

7. I'm going to shout out to Donna Haraway here. Situate your knowledge. Going back to #1, learn the context of what you're seeing and apply that to your actions in the ethnic enclave. I get that you might not have seen anything like the ornate architecture along Chinatown's Wentworth Avenue anywhere else in Chicago. However, you might want to recall the context of it and remember that those dragons and tilework were a huge assertion by the Chinese American community's right to belong when they first settled the area. Internalize that understanding.

8. Be adventurous. Feel free to pick up something fun in one of the shops. (I am seriously craving a trip to Devon Avenue soon.) Try to avoid chains, though, and make your shopping local. Your purchase will go to those who live and work in that community, not some soulless corporation.

This is only a partial list, coming from an ally. However, this should help make your cultural travels more respectful and will help you get the most out of your experience. And now it has made me want to visit all of those places I mentioned! Who's coming with me?

Here's to you, Maryland!

Maryland is now the 8th state for marriage equality!

Yeah Maryland! Way to go!!!!

Now let's get our equality on in the other 42 states....

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Table for one

So I've been in my above-the-shop location for a while now (though that does not mean I'm all unpacked, that is a work in progress!). I'm not complaining about my setup, as it's quite nice to be in the heart of the downtown and able to walk anywhere I need to go. I like that the downtown has a good variety of events to attend and some great civic spirit.

But this is going to be an entry on another aspect of my life. I live on my own. That's always been my goal, and I'm glad I achieved that goal. Although I'm an outgoing person, I like my me-time and sometimes need a space of my own where there isn't anyone else. What I've noticed, though, is something kind of interesting when I start to cook my dinner or prepare my breakfast. The sizes and prices of food are really not at all conducive to cooking solo. Whenever I go grocery shopping at a supermarket (I'm not counting the ethnic groceries I love), it seems like many of the bigger items cost a lot less than the smaller ones. I don't get it. Shouldn't you be paying less if you're getting less? But no, I see gallons of milk that cost less than half-gallons and enormous boxes of cereal and cuts of meat. I mean, what's a single girl to do? I've sometimes bought the big sizes of food that isn't perishable, like pastas and jars of veggies for the sauce. Then they will last longer because it's just me eating them. If I've got my class, I'll make a bigger batch so I have leftovers. But that doesn't always work with dairy products, produce, eggs, and other things that are better off fresh. What do I do then? If I buy the gallon of milk, I save money, but there's no way that I'm going to drink it all in the 2 weeks or so that it lasts. And I feel awful about wasting food. If I buy the half gallon, I will drink it all, but I have to pay more for it. So what gives?

It's really strange that this is the case. More and more Americans are living solo, so I'm certainly not an anomaly. And this is not a call for a roommate; like I said, I like my current setup as it is. I just don't get why the food companies don't get it.

Or maybe this is just a sign that I need to throw a great big dinner party so I can use the big sizes AND save money! ;)